Loving Conversations

ORDINARY LIFE - Thoughts and Ideas to Help You Live a Happier Life

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Summary for July 29, 2018

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Dear Folks -

Wow! The presentation in Ordinary Life this week was powerful beyond words. Links below will take you to the audio of the time, their presentation slides and the video of the talk.

I had asked Josh and Holly Hudley, a couple in an interracial marriage and who have created a biracial family to share their experiences with us. They were, and are, so clear and powerful and loving. They called their time “Loving Conversations.” This was in reference to the Supreme Count’s decision in 1967 to strike down a law that forbade interracial marriage. I strongly encourage you to listen to or view their time with Ordinary Life.

Holly did send me this to share with you -

Dear friends -

I’m so grateful we have created a community that is open, willing, and curious. Josh and I had fun talking with Bill and to you all about our life...about (ultimately) being in this human project together.

One thing I wanted to reiterate clearly was the power of vulnerability in relationships. In mine and Josh’s relationship - much like many of yours - we’ve crafted a safe space to have open, vulnerable, honest conversations. Without that willingness, we cannot navigate the hardest moments in life. Through relationship we can open our hearts and change our reality and our world.

I’ve recently become acquainted with John A Powell, the leader of the Haas Institute for a Fair and Inclusive Society. In a dialogue with Krista Tippet, he said, “Being human is about being in the right kind of relationships...a process. It’s not something that we just are born {into}...If you suffer, it does not imply love. But if you love, it does imply suffering. To suffer with, through compassion, not to suffer against. And if we can hold that space big enough, we also have joy and fun even as we suffer. And suffering will no longer divide us...to me, that’s sort of the human journey.”

He described a time as a student at Stanford in the 60’s when he was a leader in the Black Student Union. As a group they agreed upon a policy of non-interaction with whites. One day he left a meeting and saw a white female student navigating her way with a cane used by the blind. She got tangled up in a litter of bikes, her cane stuck between the spokes. She turned, knocked the bikes over, turned again, knocked more over. This went on and he began to walk passed, the sound of bikes falling as he did. He paused, fought whatever inner voice he needed to, turned around and helped her out of the knot of bikes. Afterward he went back to the BSU and said, “I can’t do this. Separation is not the answer.”

His story is rich with symbolism. It invites us to look at our blind spots, to reach out and navigate our way out. Our blind spots are our best teachers., but none of us can learn from them if we stay separate. Thank you for joining us on the journey.

With love, Holly

I had asked Josh and Holly to present in Ordinary Life because I gave the sermon in the 1st and 3rd worship services at St. Paul’s.

You can read or download the text of the sermon using the link below. You can view the presentation slides, listen to the audio of the talk and/or watch the video of Josh and Holly's time in Ordinary Life using the links below.

If you are reading this, I want you to know how grateful I am for and to you.

Be well and much love,

Bill Kerley

You can read or download the text of the sermon, "Crossing Boundaries," by clicking here.

You can listen to the sermon by clicking on the audio file below.

You can view the presentation slides that Josh and Holly prepared for their talk by clicking here.

Holly and Josh_7.29.18.jpg

To watch the video of "Loving Conversations", click on the player below.